|I am so FURIOUS right now....
||[Jul. 18th, 2006|10:37 pm]
I know that this is my fic journal, but I just can't contain my anger right now. I was checking my other LJ and reading my friends' recent entries when I happened upon one by a friend of mine who is..."in the same situation as me." If you don't know what I mean by that, then figure it out. (sorry for the rudeness but I'm PISSED OFF!!!) |
So, she is basically pouring her heart out about why this world can't be more tolerant, and wondering what is wrong with her. (honey, nothing is wrong with you! It's everyone else who is FUCKED UP!) All she wants is to fall in love, have a family, and grow old with someone. And yet, she is constantly assaulted by people all around her who just don't get it. They not only "just dont' get it" but they are completely intolerant, ignorant, and deserving of nothing. I am not normally this hateful towards anyone but some people DESERVE IT! Boy, if I could just run into one of these people on the street, I would re-deck their halls!
And then to make matters worse: I commented on her post (literally sobbing simultaneously) and I kinda poured my heart and anger out too. I put myself a little bit more out there than I normally would (at least somewhere I can't "friends lock" it.). Then I go off and do other things on my computer (unfortunately, not writing my fics. definitely not in the mood). I was checking my email before going to bed when I saw that someone else had commented on her post. ...
I wanted to throw my laptop out of the fucking window. I couldn't believe what these IDIOTS were saying. Now, I'm all for being entitled to your own opinion. I think it's great. But not when your opinion hurts other people who are SUPPOSEDLY your friends or when you are trying to force it on someone else. I wanted so badly to rip into these sons of bitches, but I just couldn't. I had to just ex out of the page before I did anything stupid. Afterall, I need to protect myself as well. (paranoid? yes, a little. ok, a lot.)
I feel like such a coward right now for not standing up for my "friend" (seeing as I have only known her a couple of months and met her online. Yet i consider her a friend. we have had a lot of lovely conversations and lonely commiserations).
I'm not a religious person, in fact, I generally REALLY dislike organized religion. I consider myself spiritual and at the best times agnostic but never religious in any way. And this shit makes me remember why. (that and the fact that I don't think a "God" or "gods" would take away a 28 year old mother and a 7 year old, innocent little girl from their family and leave me in the FUCKING WAKE!!! *sigh* I need to breathe, and remove my fingers from the laptop before they catch fire.)
This is really upsetting me. I need to step away from this for a minute before I have a serious breakdown. I already can barely see my computer screen as it is.
just one more thing....